As you do

Staring in the mirror, 

I try to see what you do,

You, who holds me up,

Pushes me forward,

Builds me back up,

When I am broken,

You, who sees the magic in my life,

The light, the art and the beauty,

You, who believes I am worthy.

I’ve lost myself in the abyss,

So many times,

And crawled out alone,

Scratched and torn,

Wounded, from old scars,

That are just waiting to split back open,

They never did heal, 

Maybe they never will.

But, they scab over with you,

Skin stitches together

Not healed, no,

Just patched over,

To stem the relentless bleeding of my unforgiveness.

The slow dying of a soul.

The slow fading of a fire.

It feels easier this way.

I may never see it,

But, perhaps on a good day,

The sun may shine on me too,

And I will finally see me,

As you do.